Tag Archives: goop

Hi My Name Is… DaisyDukeDragonDemolisher and…

Pseudonyms. Some of the best writers in history have used them (Frost, Mark Twain, etc. etc.) and I think that is really cool. Live your life peacefully, but still have famous books. It’s my dream.

Then there are those people who write as themselves and also have a pseudonym, but keep them separate. I get that too. Some things you write could affect the way people think of your other novels, so you use a pseudonym. That’s a really smart plan. Kudos to you for being innovative with your profession.

And then there are the people *acidic glare* who write as themselves and from a pseudonym, but tell everyone that they are the same person.

WHAT IS THE POINT OF HAVING A PSEUDONYM IF YOU ARE GOING TO TELL EVERYONE YOU ARE THE SAME?

This is honestly one of my weirdest and biggest pet peeves. There is no point in having a pseudonym if you are going to reveal that the pseudonym is yourself. No point at all, it’s a waste of brain cells and it confuses the fudge out of your readers.

Nerdy Girl 1: Hey Nerdy Girl 2! Have you read J. Lynn’s book, Wait for You, yet?

Nerdy Girl 2: J. Lynn wrote that? Who is that? I thought Wait for You was by Jennifer L. Armentrout.

Nerdy Girl 1: No, it says it’s by J. Lynn on the cover.

Nerdy Girl 2: I thought it said Jennifer L. Armentrout.

Nerdy Girl 1: Well who wrote it?

To figure out the mystery of J. Lynn and Jennifer L. Armentrout look below:

I didn’t want to point fingers, but I’m going to have to.

***By the way, I don’t dislike this author as a writer or as a person.***

Jennifer L. Armentrout. She writes sappy, goopey, romances that contain all of the Young Adult romance book flaws from my other article (The Sad [but true] Thing About Romance). I’ve read her books. Some I really dislike. Others are okay. But I have now (just on principle) decided that I will never read her work again because of the one incredibly frustrating thing she did:

What? Does she have multiple personality disorder? Is J. Lynn one of her alters?

NO. So why would she have a pseudonym if she’s okay with people knowing her real name and writing from her real name? THERE IS NO POINT.

It’s like having your username: DaisyDukeDragonDemolisher for World of Warcraft and then telling everyone you meet your real name.

What was the point of coming up with a username that would make you anonymous to people if you were just going to tell everyone online your real name anyways?

And for those who are wondering about examples of the people who write as themselves and from a pseudonym so that no one will know that it’s them. I can’t give you any because they unlike some people, they don’t tell everyone who they are when they are using their pseudonyms.

Exhausted and frustrated kisses. xxx

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The Sad (but true) Thing About Romance

You know that giddy feeling you get when the girl gets the guy in some heart-meltingly sweet way at the end of the book?

*raises hand* I DO!

Yeah, those books are the best. I love em’ to death. I really do.

BUT… Yep there is a ‘but.’
But it will never happen to you, him, her, me… cat (hehe embarrassing Twilight moment).

All of those darling romance novels create a false hope and high expectations within us all. This process starts at an early age, maybe 1 or 2 when you first see Cinderella or Snow White. I know that I was spell-bound (no pun intended… Okay definitely a pun intended) by the happily ever afters and singing animals.

Well reality check! There sure as hell aren’t any singing chipmunks at my window helping me get ready for my first date with my future high school sweetheart/rich husband that makes his fortune off of bettering the world through his innovative phone app! (That might have been a little specific. :P)

Every teenage girl needs to look deep into her heart and ask herself this question: Am I really going to be the one to change him?

And I know random question! But come on people, we all know that is what most of these Young Adult romances are about! (That and abuse!)

Just look at all of the popular romance novels for teens today! Abuse, foster care, bad-boy with a gooey center, death in the family, substance abuse, etc. etc.

Every. Single. One.

And in the end the bad-boy changes and becomes monogamous, the two down on their luck foster kids end up married after one gets almost beat to death, they run away as wolf lovers, she conquers her fear of her rapist and learns to trust her new boyfriend, she finally regains her memory of her mom trying to kill her and her boyfriend finally trusts his brothers foster parents and they go live together, blah blah yuck.

I’m taking this goop to task. It’s not realistic. It’s not practical. It’s just not something you should be investing your free time in.

Read Fantasy. Now you might be saying, “Now hold up! How is reading Fantasy not going against everything you said up there?”

And now I shall answer you:
We all know magic, witches, and dragons aren’t real. We can separately define Fantasy and reality, but we can’t define fantastical romance and reality without getting the two all muddled up in each other.

You know that you are never going to get your Hogwarts letter (though you might hope), you just decide to go to Universal Studios Hogwarts. But romance is such a broad and intricate notion that is all over the world. So you can’t help but hope that you might find your one true love and live peacefully in a picture perfect house, alternating your time between your adorable kids and your husband’s (and your) demanding libido.

All of these expectations let us girls down and actually will really harm our future relationships.

So in conclusion:
All you teenagers (and this applies to me too! I have read all of those books I described up there) hoping and dreaming for your Young Adult romance novel perfect relationship, give up! I’m sorry if this is depressing, but it’s going to be a whole lot more depressing when you have to settle.

Think about it.

Kisses. xxx

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